A Pirate's bLog

My SIte

2005-08-01T12:30:00.000-07:00

Captain's Log

That is my real site... i just have this so i can comment on odd people who only allow other Blogger users to comment...

A Wench Wants Me... Winch...

2005-06-08T12:56:00.000-07:00

A wench wants me winch, all I can say. She knows it be large, but she be a wench o' poorer morals than I be willin' te bunk, for i fear viruses, an' i also already got a wench in me bunk, as it be. Me wench in te bunk wants me te see if te wench o' poor morals will try to steal me while me wench be out o' town... so I be supposed te flirt wit' her.... but i dun want te! We will see 'ow this goes... but no matter what... she will not get me winch!

Tips

2005-06-07T01:47:00.000-07:00

Things i have noticed regarding tips on the job:

Tips fluctuate greatly.
Tips increase when thar be no stubble upon me chin.
Old people, particularly old women, tip well.
People with kids tip poorly.

Me new site is doing well

2005-06-05T14:20:00.000-07:00

Me new site 'as pirate biographies, talk like a pirate how to, pirate parties, and more! visit it! AnythingPirate.com

New site

2005-05-31T21:36:00.000-07:00

visit AnythingPirate

Photo by PirateDude

2005-05-28T16:25:00.000-07:00

Photo by PirateDude...

Picture Made by Talon Li Vinci

2005-05-28T15:48:00.000-07:00

Made By Talon Li Vinci.

Lawsuit Revisited

2005-05-28T11:58:00.000-07:00

Oi won ze court case, an' zey got nothin' outta me. Oi 'ave ze practice 'or ze game wit' ze brightly colored ball and ze nets... an' then Oi 'ave work for 5 1/2 hours at subway... yay...... :(

Ze lawsuit

2005-05-25T19:26:00.000-07:00

'ell... me long john silver got smashed pretty good... and now Oi 'ave a lawsuit on me hands... they say a man who represents himself in court has a fool for a client... I guess I 'ave a fool for a client. They are claiming I am discriminating based on the fact that he is half Mexican... even though i gave him 2 shots...

I should win...

Result of Balloons For Charity

2005-05-24T20:30:00.000-07:00

Oi took quite a beating from ze balloons Oi sold to other students. Oi only made 15$ profit fer ze battered women's shelter, and 'ave a few battle scars... One student tried to sue me in the simulation because Oi wouldn't sell to 'im after the 2nd perfect pitch to my face. 'e said i'twas cuzz he was Mexican... Oi let him take 2 shots, didn't Oi? He lost the lawsuit, ze little prick.

Balloons for Charity

2005-05-23T21:28:00.000-07:00

So, for business class, Oi am setting up a business in which people may pay 50cents for a normal water balloon, and 75 cents for a chilled one, to throw at me during lunch times, in a controlled environment. Oi mateys, it be great paisn Oi take to support ze "Battered Women's Shelter". I 'ope zey appreciate ze pain Oi will most likely go through on ze 'morrow.

Oi 'ope me Long John Silver doesneh ge' smashed...

Today

2005-05-22T12:52:00.000-07:00

Today Oi am planning on going to ze Star Wars move with 2 Alex's, and zen Oi must go to ze play. Oi did alright last night... only skipped 2 lines... Some people skipped entire speeches... Aye... Oi love you, guyz...

Ze current times...

2005-05-21T00:58:00.000-07:00

Oi mateys... ze play es a shambles... Oi 'ave me part down, but me scene mates haveneh shown fer ze rehearsals an' ze opening nigh' es on ze morrow. En ze wee hours o' ze morning me matey an' me will be taking our loot to ze trading post in hopes of redeeming it... an' zen Oi am volunteering at ze school for an Art Festival, and zen Oi am performing in the play... aye aye aye...

Real definition of Mortgage

2005-05-20T01:45:00.000-07:00

Mortgage-n. Mortgage comes from the word mort which is the sound of a horn used to denote ze death of a deer during a hunt for ze precious meat, and the word gage means something deposited or given as security against an obligation.

So, mateys, ze word mortgage to a pirate means the sound of a horn blowing which represents your death, 'cause yer entire treasure has just been put up as a gage to protect yeh from yer othe' debts...

Definition

2005-05-19T09:34:00.000-07:00

Oi...

Paradox- n. Oi sailed up to zeh shore an' couldneh choose which dock 'tween ze paradox tha' Oi found to dock at....

Ze "Break"

2005-05-18T19:05:00.000-07:00

Me wench told me yesterday zat we need to go on a break. It isn't turning out to be a break, cuzz she can't keep 'er hands off o' me even still, and Oi am ze same way. Sh' thinks sh' relies on meh too much, an' does nothi' on ze days Oi am workin' o' am busy. But she doesneh eve' like any' 'cep' meh. Oi jes' 'ope sh' realizes Oi am ze best fer 'er.

Labors

2005-05-18T09:26:00.000-07:00

Oi work en a small sandwich shop an' it is a rather easy, yet low paying job fer ze likes o' me. Well... it es me first job, an' Oi got me first check o' loot yesterday... $170! Oi was amazed! Oi shall continue ze after school loot plunders for ze precious metals an plastic... but probably nah wit' ze same zest...

Oi... an' work agin a night, an play rehearsal til 9 every eve'.... ARRRGGGh.

Accrue

2005-05-17T01:15:00.000-07:00

Oi've accrued a crew o' mateys, who want in on me lootin' gig.
Oi've accepted a couple, a mate an' 'is wench, who'll split zeir loot even 'tween zem both.

Oi get 50%, zey get 50%, and Oi am sitting happy, wit' me recently accrued crew.

Play Rehearsal...

2005-05-17T01:03:00.000-07:00

Aye, mateys... Oi 'ad play re'earsal en ze aftanoon an' Oi did pretty damned well, Oi might say... but me scene matey is a blooty genius so Oi look like Seagull droppings!

Me an me matey collected a large bag o' loot, an' ate taco bell an' KFC... Oi don't particularly like ze KFC... makes me remeber poor Polly... may he sail en peace in Parrot Heaven...

After zat pile o' grog... ye'll be needin' a new tattoo.... why dontche let me do it fer yeh?

Does "Tide" Stain Iffin' It Rests Too Long?

2005-05-16T09:21:00.000-07:00

Zo, me machine o' washing me clothes ez broken. Aye, 'ateve' bilgerat broke it, iffin' Oi kne' 'twas 'im, 'ed 'ave 'is throat slit and 'is blood spilled inte ze briny deep. Me work clothes're covered in ze foam o' ze "Tide" an' Oi guessen Oi gottsta wash'em in ze Public Bath... ARGHHHH!!!

Ahoy, mateys, tis aboot time'n me shove'n off.... 'ave a bonnie day.

Silly Americans

2005-05-15T18:59:00.000-07:00

Zo, zere's a fracas over This
Ze newsweek reporters claim they were wrong, and will likely be forced to resign.

Ze lubbers at large are thrown over board by ze fact zat such incorrect information could have been printed!

But, me question ez, 'ow do we know zey are not lieing NOW? Zere really WERE Desecrations, but zey are zaying zey were wrong to avoid a 'oly war? Oi 'lieve zat me mateys 'ere en America were forced to claim zey were incorrect by ze 'uvment to avoid 'oly war....

A Pirate's Life fo' me.

2005-05-15T18:37:00.000-07:00

Zo, en ze morn' me y me 'rents wen' to breackie, an' me 'ad some excellentisimo Waffles wit whipped cream an' strawberries.

After zat, me matey came over an' we organized our half dozen Bags o' Loot into Cans, Plastic, and Glass for hauling to ze Reciclaje center.

Zee, me an me matey an' 'is wench, afta school es ova, we sail through the Loot Bins of our school, plundering ze precious metals and plastic. We've been doing it for a week. We also 'ave suppliers... people 'o leave their cans out for us to grab at certain times. Oi dunno 'ow much we make, but it looks like we have 5-6 LARGE trash bags of reciclajes...

Zo, we organized... but zen the trading post 'as closed, an' we couldneh redeem our reward. 'ell, next saturday, Oi guess.

Aboot ze start.

2005-05-15T01:54:00.000-07:00

Aye, livin' en the isles o' Hawai'i, this pirate lives as a young hooligan in a small shanty of a school. Zere es th' drama of going to a small coed school, and ze drama of living life, and th' drama of having a job... it is all very difficult... yet it is not. You shall see...